fries – Page 19 – Tasty Burgers

The Burger Cellar

Published on January 4, 2015 by Michael NusairLeave a comment

Location: 3391 Yonge Street, Toronto
Website: http://theburgercellar.com/

The Burger Cellar serves a pretty good burger. The end.

What, I can’t just leave it at that? I mean, it is my blog. I’m pretty sure I can do whatever I want.

Fine, I’ll write a few more words. This is probably going to be a quick one, though; there are only so many reviews of good-but-not-great burgers I can write before they all start to blend into an interchangeable jumble of phrases like “beefy flavour” and “tightly packed.”

The Burger Cellar bills itself as a “burger grill + wine bar,” so yeah, it’s a bit classier than your average burger joint. It’s also a bit pricier than your average burger joint, but I guess you should probably expect that from a place with wine pairings on the menu.

Every burger on the menu comes with two beef choices: AAA Black Angus Natural, or Prime, which costs an extra four bucks. I asked the waitress what the difference was, and she told me the cuts of beef that each choice was made from. I immediately thought to myself “what a helpful tidbit for my review!” and then promptly forgot everything she said.

I think — and please don’t quote me on this — the Black Angus is made from chuck, and the Prime is made from brisket, but I might be way off on that one. I think I might have the worst memory on the planet. You laugh now, but when it turns out I have ultra early onset Alzheimer’s, it won’t be so hilarious.

I asked the waitress which of the two she recommended, and of course she went with the more expensive choice. So I ordered that, and went with the Original Classic Burger, which comes topped with “lettuce, vine-ripened tomato, red onion and a kosher dill pickle.”

As I mentioned before, it’s nothing special, but it’s pretty good. The medium well patty had a mild-but-there beefy flavour, a little bit of juiciness, and an okay texture. It’s a bit too finely ground and densely packed, and thus a bit on the tough side, but I’ve certainly had worse.

I wasn’t crazy about the sesame seed bun, which was a bit too substantial for the task at hand, and which tasted slightly stale.

Along with the aforementioned toppings (which were fine), ketchup, mustard, relish, and mayo were all provided on the side. The mayo was actually quite tasty — definitely a cut above the standard Hellmann’s.

The burger doesn’t come with any sides, so I ordered fries. They were top-notch.

3 out of 4

The Senator

Published on December 21, 2014March 1, 2015 by Michael Nusair3 Comments

Location: 249 Victoria Street, Toronto
Website: http://thesenator.com/

I was actually pretty excited to check out the Senator — any restaurant that’s been around since the ’30s has gotta be doing something right, and the place is absolutely lousy with old-school diner charm.

I’d also heard some pretty good things about their burger, which is reportedly made with beef from Cumbrae’s — one of Toronto’s more well-known butchers of note — and which is refreshingly cheap at $9.95 (including fries).

You know that part in Goodfellas where a character thinks he’s becoming a made man, only to be led into an empty basement where he has a brief moment of horror before a bullet goes into the back of his head? That was my reaction when I was served this burger. Excitement to horror in about 0.5 seconds.

Is boiling burgers a thing? Is that something that they do? I didn’t think so, but I really don’t know how else to account for the lifelessly pallid, colourless patty they put in front of me.

I’m going to assume that the patty was griddled, but I honestly don’t know how you cook a burger like that without getting even a hint of browning on the patty. If this weren’t so clearly undesirable, I’d think it was deliberate. Because seriously, how do you accomplish that? How do you cook a piece of meat on a hot surface without browning it? But it can’t possibly be on purpose. Can it?

This wasn’t a one-off mistake, either, because my dining companion had the burger as well and his looked identically sad.

Of course, if this were just a matter of appearances, then who cares? But a burger gets a lot of its flavour and texture from the griddle or the grill, so in a case like this, it’s losing out on quite a bit. You can tell from the first bite that something very essential is missing.

It was also a meatloaf burger, and had enough stuff mixed into the patty that its Cumbrae’s pedigree was completely wasted. No beefy flavour here; just onions and spices and other stuff that you don’t need. It’s meatloaf — but then again at least meatloaf has a glaze and a nice brown crust from the oven. I can’t repeat this enough: this tasted boiled.

If it even matters, the texture of the patty was otherwise okay. I think it was a bit too finely ground with a slightly mealy texture, and the well done patty was drier than I’d like, but I’ve certainly had worse.

The burger comes with lettuce, tomato, and caramelized onions off to the side. The tomato was sliced a bit thick, but the toppings were otherwise fine. However, between the sweetness of the onions and the slightly sweet (and ever-so-slightly dry) bun, it was kind of sweet overload. I wound up putting mustard on the burger to try to combat this, which I almost never do (I typically find it to be a bit over-assertive on a hamburger). It helped, but there wasn’t much to be done here; it was a lost cause.

The fries weren’t much better. They were completely soggy and practically dripping with grease, with the overwhelming flavour of oil that’s been reused one (or two, or three) times too many.

They even, somehow, managed to mess up lemonade. This is a drink that consists of three ingredients: lemon juice, water, and sugar. How do you get that wrong? Missing one of those three essential ingredients would do it. The drink was astringently sour, without even a hint of sweetness. If it’s not sweet at all, is it still even lemonade? Or is it just watered down lemon juice? More importantly, if everything else is this bad, does it matter?

1.5 out of 4

Stein Burger and Koop

Published on December 7, 2014 by Michael NusairLeave a comment

Location: 1285 Elgin Mills Road East, Richmond Hill
Website: http://www.steinburgerandkoop.com/

This was actually my second time going to Stein Burger and Koop. It wasn’t my second time eating there, but it was my second time at the restaurant. A couple of friends and I visited a few months ago; we were seated and handed menus, and then promptly ignored for the next half hour. None of us were in a particularly confrontational mood, so we eventually just left, sad and burgerless. The amazingly bad service (or non-existent, more accurately) would have been impressive if it weren’t so frustrating.

I guess everyone deserves a second chance, so I recently found myself back at the restaurant; the service was much better this time (well, there was service, which by default means it was better).

Stein Burger and Koop is essentially a sports bar, with mostly burgers and wings on the menu, and the usual generic selection of sandwiches and wraps to round things out. I went with the Steinburger, which is no-frills with just lettuce, tomato, onion, and their “signature sauce.”

It’s a smashed and griddled burger, because apparently that’s the law. Didn’t you hear? They passed that law. All burgers have to be smashed now.

It’s fine. There’s not much crust from the griddle, and the well-done burger was quite dry, but it was okay. Nothing about it offended me. There wasn’t much beefy flavour (or any flavour at all, really), but again, it was perfectly edible.

The toppings, too, were fine. The onions were too strong for my taste (but then I find most raw onions too strong, so that’s on me) and the “signature sauce” basically tasted like plain mayo, but it all got the job done.

The soft, fresh bun was mostly okay, though it wasn’t quite up to the task at hand; even with the fairly dry patty, the bottom bun sogged up and was close to falling apart in the last few bites.

But whatever. There are certainly worse burgers in the GTA. You can eat here, I guess. When you do, you’ll think to yourself “Yes, that was a burger I just ate.” Then you’ll stand up, walk out the door, and never think about it again. It will be consigned to the trash-dump of your memory, where all the hundreds of anonymous, unmemorable meals that you’ll eat throughout your lifetime will go to be forgotten about forever.

Maybe a few months later someone will ask you about it. “You ate there, right?” they’ll ask, looking to you for some form of guidance. “How was it?” You’ll rack your brain, straining to remember if you’ve ever even been there, let alone how the burger was. This will be for naught. It’s gone. Nothing about that visit has remained.

On your deathbed, in that brief moment after your heart stops beating and your brain shuts down, a synapse — unused for decades — will suddenly fire. You will remember that meal, that mediocre burger. “Oh yeah, I guess I did eat there” you’ll think, and then darkness.

2.5 out of 4

Stupidburger

Published on November 30, 2014 by Michael Nusair1 Comment

Location: 9750 Weston Road, Unit #2, Vaughan
Website: http://www.stupidburger.ca/

Stupid burgers need the most attention.

Sorry for the random paraphrased Simpsons quote, but I literally cannot hear the name of this place without thinking of that particular line.

It’s certainly an odd name for a restaurant, but if an unusual name is what it takes for a burger joint to be noticed these days, so be it.

I’ll admit it though, my expectations weren’t super high. The only thing I had heard about this place was this lukewarm review from a fellow Toronto burger blogger. Between that and the name, I dialed my expectations way down.

If nothing else, the place is delightfully affordable. Though they have a really extensive menu with all kinds of pre-topped burgers and various patty choices, I went simple with just the regular 6 oz burger. As a combo with fries and a drink, it came up to less than nine bucks with tax.

Given the prices I’ve gotten used to paying at Toronto burger joints, it’s almost suspiciously cheap.

I’m just going to say it then: it’s a really good burger. Though nothing about it blew me away, it gets pretty much everything right and very little wrong. It’s griddled, with a decent amount of crust. It’s nice and juicy despite being cooked to well done. It’s coarsely ground and not too tightly packed, giving it a really satisfying texture. It has a mild but very pleasant beefy flavour. And the fresh, lightly toasted bun suits the patty perfectly.

I really enjoyed it. It’s nothing I’m going to lose my mind over or urge you to go way out of your way to try; it’s just a perfectly executed fast-food-style burger that’s really tasty and satisfying. Considering the price, you can’t ask for much more than that.

As for the fries, they were seriously tasty, and right on par with the hamburger.

Stupidburger… more like… notstupidburger, right guys?

I’ll show myself out.

3.5 out of 4

The Tavern by Trevor

Published on November 16, 2014November 16, 2014 by Michael NusairLeave a comment

Location: 147 Spadina Avenue, Toronto
Website: http://www.tavernbytrevor.com/

Though The Tavern by Trevor isn’t technically on Toronto Life’s list of the twenty best burgers in the city, it’s a spin-off of a restaurant that is (Trevor Kitchen and Bar), so I sort of figured I was in good hands.

The burger they serve is labelled as a Kobe burger. Excuse me for going on a brief rant, but this is misguided on several levels, not the least of which being that anything called Kobe beef in Canada is almost certainly not actually Kobe beef. Kobe beef refers to a specific breed of cattle raised in a specific part of Japan (Kobe), and is pretty much never exported to Canada — not legally, at least. It’s far more likely that what’s being served here is Wagyu beef, which is similar enough to Kobe that many restaurants feel okay labeling it as such, even if it’s not really true.

That’s not to mention that the biggest appeal of Kobe (or Wagyu) beef is its prodigious marbling, which is rendered entirely moot when you grind it up for a hamburger.

So basically, labeling something as a Kobe burger is completely meaningless. It is a marketing ploy at best, and an excuse to overcharge at worst. Fortunately the latter isn’t the case here; at ten bucks (plus an additional five for fries), the price is about on par with what you’d expect at a restaurant like this.

The 6 oz Kobe Burger is described as coming with “horseradish mayo, smoked cheddar & caramelized onion.”

The grilled burger came cooked to medium rare and was reasonably juicy. I think, however, that the heat was too high, as the exterior of the burger was thoroughly charred, with an unpleasantly acrid, bitter flavour.

The patty was also too tightly packed and, I think, a bit too finely ground. It was fine in the medium rare centre, but the well done edges were dry, dense, and unpleasant.

Still, the bulk of the patty (i.e. everything but the edges) is fairly tasty with a good texture, though the pervasive bitterness is unfortunate.

The smoked cheddar is creamy, nicely melted and not too sharp, allowing the beef to be the star of the show. The horseradish mayo also suits the burger pretty well.

Sadly, the bun was awful. Dry, unpleasantly dense, and — I think — more than a little bit stale, it’s a complete fiasco. It’s definitely one of the shoddiest buns I’ve had in quite a long time.

Basically, it’s a good burger with a few pretty major flaws. With a fresh bun and without being way over-charred it actually could have been really good, but sadly they served what they served.

As for the fries, they were outstanding. Really tasty and addictively crispy without ever becoming too crunchy, they were pretty great.

3 out of 4