Toronto – Page 17 – Tasty Burgers

Hole-E Burger Bar

Published on June 7, 2015 by Michael NusairLeave a comment

Location: 2419 Yonge Street, Toronto
Website: http://www.holeeburger.com/

Hole-E Burger Bar’s gimmick is that all their burgers are punched with holes pre-cooking. Why? To justify the name? Their website claims that the holes allow the burgers to be “evenly cooked to perfection,” though common sense would dictate that the opposite should be true. They also claim that they fill the holes with sauce; whether a burger really needs more places to cram sauce is questionable, but that’s probably a debate for another time. Because in this particular case, the whole thing is moot (get it? Whole thing?? Ah, get out of here, no one appreciates puns).

There were no holes in my burger. Like, not one single hole. So… that’s odd (or not odd at all, since a burger really shouldn’t have holes in it to begin with). There were a few dimples where maybe some holes had once been, but it otherwise looked like a standard patty.

So without any oddball hole gimmicks to fall back on, how was the burger? Not great.

I ordered the standard, plain burger, and had it topped with pickles, tomato, and mayo. The well done patty is griddled, with a decent — if not exactly awe-inspiring — amount of crust. It was also reasonably juicy, which is always a good thing.

But there were problems, the foremost being the downright weird texture.

You know when you eat a steak, and you accidentally get a mouthful of gristle, and you really have to chew it thoroughly before you can swallow? To a certain extent, that’s what every mouthful of this burger felt like. You’d chew and you’d chew, and you’d think you were done, but then nope — there was this tough, oddly ropey beef still hanging out in your mouth, refusing to get fully chewed.

It was bizarre, to put it mildly, and I really don’t even have a theory as to how it could have happened. It was definitely too finely ground, but that alone can’t account for the textural weirdness going on here. And my dining companion had the exact same issue, so this wasn’t just a one-patty issue.

The beef mostly tasted okay, but had a slightly off flavour. It was also way over-peppered, but both of those complaints fade into the background when the texture of the burger is so wonky.

The bun and toppings were okay, at least, and the fries were pretty great. The restaurant is also right next door to some really delicious cupcakes via the Cupcake Shoppe, so the outing wasn’t a complete bust.

2 out of 4

Fran’s Restaurant

Published on May 24, 2015 by Michael NusairLeave a comment

frans
Location: 20 College Street, Toronto
Website: http://www.fransrestaurant.com/

I was perusing the menu at Fran’s with no particular desire to order the burger — but then something caught my eye. On the menu, they claim to have invented the banquet burger. A banquet burger, for the unaware, is another name for a bacon cheeseburger.

I’m a little bit skeptical that the bacon cheeseburger was created at a diner in Toronto; I’d say it’s more likely that they invented the term banquet burger, but hey, who knows?

Either way, they’ve clearly been serving it for a long, long time (they’ve been around since the ’40s), so I figured I’d be remiss in my burger blogging duties if I didn’t give it a try.

The menu also states that they make their burger patties with a “special blend of spices and seasoning.” I’m generally not a fan of burgers with stuff mixed into the patties, so I’m not going to lie: I was skeptical. But you know what? Sometimes places like this can surprise you.

This was not one of those times.

It’s so meatloafy. Like, crazy meatloafy. I could talk about how strongly spiced it is, how the flavour of the beef is completely gone. I could talk about how it’s ground way too finely, and has a texture that’s closer to sausage than to hamburger. I could talk about how a burger like this completely misses the point of what makes a burger so great in the first place. I could talk about all that, but instead:

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The banquet part of this burger is actually the highlight; the creamy mild cheddar is nicely melty and gooey, and the thick-cut bacon was way above average. Too bad they’re both resting atop a mediocre patty.

The fries are even worse. At least they put some effort into the burger, even if that effort is ill advised. The fries are just bottom-of-the-barrel frozen fries. I am continually baffled by how terrible frozen fries like this continue to be served at restaurants. They taste so lousy, and really, is it that hard to cut a potato into strips? Get out of here.

1.5 out of 4

The Daughter

Published on April 19, 2015 by Michael NusairLeave a comment

Location: 1588 Dupont Street, Toronto
Website: http://farmhousehospitality.tumblr.com/

I’ve been hearing good things about the burger at the Farmhouse Tavern. This is not a review of the Farmhouse Tavern. I was in the area, and it was lunch, and the Farmhouse Tavern was closed. Solution: The Daughter, a spinoff restaurant, which is open for lunch, and which also serves a burger.

That burger? The Franklin Burger, per the menu: “Farmhouse beef / bun / sauce w/ cheese / lettuce / tomato / onions.”

It’s pretty good. The sizable patty (probably about six ounces) has a nice crispy crust from the grill, though it is leaning a bit towards over-charred.

It’s also too tightly packed; though the medium rare-ish middle of the burger (it’s somewhere between medium and medium rare) is nice and tender, the more well done edges suffer from over-density, and are a bit too tough.

Still, it’s a fairly juicy burger, which helps make up for some of its deficiencies. The mild (but nice) beefy flavour is also a firm plus in this burger’s favour.

I wasn’t too crazy about the cheese, however. The menu doesn’t specify the type of cheese, which turned out to be goat’s cheese. It’s an unusual choice for a hamburger, and eating it here, it’s pretty clear why. The strongly salty, sour flavour is way too assertive in this context, completely overwhelming the flavour of the beef. It’s not bad, but the balance of flavours is off.

The sauce is a tangy, Mac sauce-esque concoction, though again, the flavour here is pretty much all goat’s cheese, all the time.

The other toppings were fine, and the soft, fluffy sesame seed bun was above average.

As for the fries, they were really crispy and creamy and tasty; complimented with the curry-tinged ketchup, they were pretty stellar.

3 out of 4

Richmond Station

Published on April 5, 2015 by Michael NusairLeave a comment

Location: 1 Richmond Street West, Toronto
Website: http://richmondstation.ca/

People have been raving about the burger at Richmond Station since it opened a couple of years ago. So of course, the place has been on my list for quite a while (and this is a literal list, FYI – I have a Google map that I keep updated with about a hundred burgers I need to check out. I’ll empty out that map one day. One day).

The chef here, Carl Heinrich, previously worked at Marben, and set out on his own after winning Top Chef Canada. The Marben connection is super obvious when you taste the burger; it is very, very similar.

In fact, you could probably just read my Marben review and get a pretty good idea of what I thought about this one, but they are different enough that I guess I should write a few words.

The Stn. Burger, as per the menu: “lettuce, beet chutney, aged cheddar, milk bun.”

The biggest connection between the two restaurants is unmentioned on the menu. Like the burger at Marben, the one here is stuffed with braised short ribs.

They’re also both about the same size, and though they appear small, they’re substantial. There’s very little risk that you’ll walk away hungry.

Fortunately, though the short ribs at Marben were a bit overpowering, they seem to have a more subtle flavour here. I compared the burger there to an upscale sloppy joe, and that’s less of an issue here. It tastes more like a traditional hamburger.

The ground beef at Marben was also a little bit too lean, resulting in a slightly dry burger. Again, that’s less of an issue here. The burger is quite juicy.

What is an issue, however? The beef (which has a mild but satisfying beefy flavour) is way too densely packed, and has an oddly chewy, rubbery texture that’s closer to sausage than to hamburger.

There’s a video online of Heinrich making the burger, and you can see him squeezing the hell out of the patty with some kind of industrial squeezing machine. I guess that’s necessary to keep the short ribs from bursting out during the cooking process, but it definitely doesn’t do the burger’s texture any favours.

As for the sausage-like texture, I’m not sure; it’s possible that they’re making and salting the patties well in advance, with the salt affecting the beef from the outside, and the short ribs affecting it from the inside.

Still, despite the textural weirdness, it’s definitely tasty, and it’s definitely satisfying. The melted cheddar isn’t too overpowering, and the beet chutney and pickled onions add some zing while still allowing the beef to be the star of the show. The toasted bun is nice and fresh, and holds up nicely to the messy burger.

The patty is grilled, apparently, though I couldn’t see or taste any evidence of that on the patty. If I hadn’t watched the aforementioned video, I honestly wouldn’t have known how they cooked it.

As for the fries, they were amazing. Perfectly cooked and tinged with rosemary, they were delicious on their own but even better with the horseradish-infused dipping sauce. Seriously, seriously good.

3 out of 4

Thompson Diner

Published on March 22, 2015 by Michael NusairLeave a comment

Location: 550 Wellington Street West, Toronto
Website: http://www.thompsondiner.com/

Nope.

Seriously, just: no. I could rant and rave, but I’m not even going to waste my time writing a particularly long review of this hamburger. The kitchen staff at the Thompson Diner clearly don’t respect their clientele enough to make a burger even remotely worth eating, so why should I respect them enough to put my time and energy into a full review?

The burger at the Thompson Diner is lousy. Please do not order it. I’ll quickly explain why, then seriously, I’m out.

It’s dry. Oppressively, shockingly, inedibly dry.

Was it overcooked? I mean, it was cooked all the way to well done, but it didn’t seem to be cooked too far past that. To me, well done is overcooked, so it can be tough to differentiate between the two. But I’ve certainly had well done burgers that remained juicy.

Was the beef too lean? Almost certainly.

I noted in my most recent review, of the burger at b.good, that it was one of the driest burgers that I’ve ever had. It’s as if the chef at the Thompson Diner took this as a challenge. “You think that’s dry? I’ll show you dry.”

Maybe my burger was an aberration. Maybe they’re not always this bad. I doubt it, but maybe. But there’s no excuse for a professional kitchen to put out food this bad ever. It’s inexcusable.

The taste of the patty wasn’t horrible – it wasn’t particularly beefy, but it tasted okay. But who cares? If a burger is this dry, I really don’t care what it tastes like. It’s worthless.

The bun and toppings were also fine, but again: worthless.

The fries were bad too. Frozen and mediocre, they’re a waste of your time, though at the very least they’re not a slap in the face like that hamburger.

.5 out of 4

(Image of the front of the restaurant in the header photo taken from Caroline’s Culinary Delights. I guess I was in such a rush to get out of there that I forgot to take the photo on my way out.)